More on the snowflake!
Randy says that the next step is to expand our starting sentence into a paragraph. He likes three disasters and an ending. Set up the story beginning in the first sentence. The next sentences are for each of the disasters and the final sentence is the ending. I like this structure. Let's take a look at our sentence and our mind map.
Our starting sentence needs to set up that Mark is having black-outs that he cannot explain.
Then we need some disaster to trigger him into action. Let's have the bad guy attack his house to get his children, not find them and leave Mark wondering where the children are and why is the cat telling him to follow him under the hill in the back yard.
The next disaster needs to be that the unseelie court steals the children from the seelie court while Mark is there, and Marks Angel appears along with the fallen angel, and the seelie require that Mark lead them into battle..
The next disaster is that the Fallen angel steals one oif the children, forcing Mark to choose to leave one of them in possible danger. Mark chooses to go after his stolen child, leaving the other with the seelie court.
Finally, Mark and the Fallen Angel fight it out on a moving train, with the life of his child on the line whether he wins or looses.
Mark rescues his child from the Fallen Angel and then decides to stop the angel now, rather than let him go after his or some other child again. He throws down, and they have an epic battle somewhere.
Ok, now I have to get all of these ideas into a paragraph.
Mark Nealson is suffering from blackouts during martial arts matches, but instead of failing, he's winning. He returns home and admits it to his wife after the kids go down for bed and during this conversation the house is assaulted by four men (who rise from the dead when slain) and in the aftermath the children are missing his wife is unconscious, the cat is talking to him, and the house is on fire. He follows the cat on the urging of his wife and the cat leads him out behind the house and into the world of the seelie court where he is required to lead the court into battle to avenge the theft of his children from the court by the unseelie court. During the battle in the graveyard of the weeping angel, Mark faces the fallen angel and drives him off, but not before he grabs his daughter and flees toward the rail yard. Mark decides to leave his son in the card of the seelie court again and pursues the fallen on battles him atop a racing train while trying to keep his daughter from falling or being dropped from the train. In the end, Mark leaves his daughter in the care of a church and pursues the fallen angel to the top of an abandoned building and defeats him in a rather close battle where Mark offers to sacrifice himself to drive the fallen away permanently, but the willingness to sacrifice is enough.
Okay, wow, that's a lot of run on sentences. but it was kinda the only way to get what I wanted to happen in five sentences. I think the first and second sentences are fine. Lot's of room for character development there, but after that, meh. I think I'm going to need to exapand those a lot (hey! welcome to snowflake step #3!
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